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36+ Short Quotes From Rita Rudner | Free Hd Background Pictures Download

The best collection of quotes and images with valuable words of wisdom from the famous Rita Rudner. These popular Rita Rudner quotes may have been read by you. You will find the quotes being used everywhere, coming from ordinary people like us, who are just famous. Sometimes in life, some moments and feelings are so special that they cannot be described in simple words. They belong to the same perspective of observing life as we do. There is nothing to think about anymore. Be comfortable and learn from their thoughts, how a famous person can share the same feeling as us. Dive into the truest and wisest collection of quotes and images by Rita Rudner that is full of positivity. From different sources of the internet, all these Rita Rudner quotes have been collected only for you.

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Table of Contents

Meaningful Quotes Images By Rita Rudner

1. “A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won’t get a bikini wax.”

2. “A vegetarian is a person who won’t eat anything that can have children.”

3. “Good weather all the week, but come the weekend the weather stinks. When the weather is too hot they complain, too cold they complain, and when it’s just right, they’re watching TV.”

4. “Have children while your parents are still young enough to take care of them.”

5. “Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until the day before his anniversary to buy his wife a gift.”

6. “I don’t plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.”

7. “I gave my father $100 and said, œBuy yourself something that will make your life easier. So he went out and bought a present for my mother.”

8. “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”

9. “I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don’t know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes if I see a really great outfit, I’ll break up with someone on purpose.”

10. “I love to sleep. Do you? Isn’t it great? It really is the best of both worlds. You get to be alive and unconscious.”

A Vegetarian Is A Person Who Wont Eat Anything That Can Have Children Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
A Vegetarian Is A Person Who Wont Eat Anything That Can Have Children Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
Have Children While Your Parents Are Still Young Enough To Take Care Of Them Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
Have Children While Your Parents Are Still Young Enough To Take Care Of Them Quotes Images By Rita Rudner

Short Sayings Images By Rita Rudner

11. “I rationalize shopping. I buy a dress because I need change for gum.”

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12. “I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and say to myself well, that’s not going to happen.”

13. “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.”

14. “I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don’t even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.”

15. “I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.”

16. “If you never want to see a man again, just tell him ‘I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have children.’ They leave skid marks.”

17. “In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.”

18. “It wasn’t that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one would tell me where it was.”

19. “It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”

20. “Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.”

I Dont Plan To Grow Old Gracefully I Plan To Have Face-Lifts Until My Ears Meet Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
I Dont Plan To Grow Old Gracefully I Plan To Have Face-Lifts Until My Ears Meet Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
I Rationalize Shopping I Buy A Dress Because I Need Change For Gum Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
I Rationalize Shopping I Buy A Dress Because I Need Change For Gum Quotes Images By Rita Rudner

Motivational Quotes Pictures By Rita Rudner

21. “Marriages don’t last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?”

22. “Men hate to lose. I beat my husband once at tennis. I asked him, ‘Will we ever make love again?’ He said, ‘Yes… but not with each other.'”

23. “Men like to barbecue. Men like to cook only if danger is involved.”

24. “Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage-they’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry”

25. “Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother’s tasted better the day before.”

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26. “My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn’t want him to.”

27. “My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.”

28. “My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can’t decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives.”

29. “My husband gave me a necklace. It’s fake. I requested fake. Maybe I’m paranoid, but in this day and age, I don’t want something around my neck that’s worth more than my head.”

30. “My parents, my whole life, combined my birthday with Christmas, and you know how frustrating that is for a child, especially as I was born in July.”

I Wonder If Other Dogs Think Poodles Are Members Of A Weird Religious Cult Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
I Wonder If Other Dogs Think Poodles Are Members Of A Weird Religious Cult Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
In Hollywood A Marriage Is A Success If It Outlasts Milk Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
In Hollywood A Marriage Is A Success If It Outlasts Milk Quotes Images By Rita Rudner

Knowledgeable Quotes Pictures From Rita Rudner

31. “Neurotics build castles in the air; psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them.”

32. “Other dogs look at French Poodles and wonder if they are members of some strange religious cult.”

33. “The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him.”

34. “The word ‘aerobics’ came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we’re going to charge $10 an hour, we can’t call it Jumping up and down.”

35. “To attract men, I wear a perfume called ‘New Car Interior.'”

36. “When I was a kid, I had two friends, and they were imaginary and they would only play with each other.”

37. “Whenever I date a guy, I think, is this the man that I want my children to spend their weekends with?”

Life Is Tough Enough Without Having Someone Kick You From The Inside Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
Life Is Tough Enough Without Having Someone Kick You From The Inside Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
Men Like To Barbecue Men Like To Cook Only If Danger Is Involved Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
Men Like To Barbecue Men Like To Cook Only If Danger Is Involved Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
My Boyfriend And I Broke Up He Wanted To Get Married And I Didnt Want Him To Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
My Boyfriend And I Broke Up He Wanted To Get Married And I Didnt Want Him To Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
To Attract Men I Wear A Perfume Called New Car Interior Quotes Images By Rita Rudner
To Attract Men I Wear A Perfume Called New Car Interior Quotes Images By Rita Rudner