70+ Popular Sayings By P. J. O’Rourke | Free Hd Wallpaper Images Download
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Popular Quotes Pictures From P. J. O’Rourke
1. “A charity ball is like a dance except it’s tax deductible.”
2. “A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you’ll never be forgiven if you don’t live up to it.”
3. “A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine, something brussel sprouts never do.”
4. “A good bachelor drinks his dessert (and sometimes the rest of his meals). A sweet tooth is a danger signal that you’re getting too much exercise and not enough cocktails.”
5. “A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat.”
6. “A humorist doesn’t really do that much note-taking.”
7. “A man who drinks in a healthy, fit, and self-approving manner will mix vodka with yogurt and get tangled in the Nautilus machine trying to kiss his own ass.”
8. “A person has got to balance work and life and family in order to be a balanced person.”
9. “Agriculture is a business that has been up to its bib overalls in politics since the first Thanksgiving dinner kickback to the Indians for subsidizing Pilgrim maize production with fish head fertilizer grants.”
10. “Any terrorism is an attack on libertarian values.”

Top Quotes Images From P. J. O’Rourke
11. “Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we’re looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn’t test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.”
12. “Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.”
13. “Being a humorist is not a voluntary thing. You can tell this because in a situation where saying a funny thing will cause a lot of trouble, a humorist will still say the funny thing. No matter how inappropriate.”
14. “Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.”
15. “Don’t send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals when their cheery effect is needed.”
16. “Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system.”
17. “Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.”
18. “Everybody wants to save the earth; no one wants to help mom do the dishes.”
19. “Everything that’s fun in life is dangerous.”
20. “Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.”

Revolutionary Sayings Pictures By P. J. O’Rourke
21. “Fascism is very much a mob movement.”
22. “Fish is the only food that is considered spoiled once it smells like what it is.”
23. “Fretting about overpopulation, is a perfectly guilt free indeed, sanctimonious way for progressives to be racists.”
24. “Gay marriage acceptance is happening in the blink of an eye.”
25. “Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.”
26. “Globalization is simply opening the free marketplace to encompass the entire world.”
27. “Golf combines two favorite American pastimes, taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.”
28. “Gun violence has cost us too many political leaders, and hardly ever the worst ones.”
29. “Guns are always the best method for a private suicide. They are more stylish looking than single-edged razor blades and natural gas has gotten so expensive. Drugs are too chancy. You might mistake the dosage and just have a good time.”
30. “Harvard is the home of American ideas.”

Aesthetic Sayings Images By P. J. O’Rourke
31. “I found out that all the important lessons in life are contained in the three rules for achieving a perfect golf swing: 1. Keep your head down. 2. Follow through. 3. Be born with money.”
32. “In the Soviet Union, no industry went under until they all did.”
33. “In theory, taxes should be like shopping. What I buy is government services. What I pay are my taxes.”
34. “Marijuana is self-punishing. It makes you acutely sensitive, and in this world, what worse punishment could there be?”
35. “More modern poetry is written than read.”
36. “Network television has been attempting to lure viewers for years with its low-interest programming only to have those viewers discover later that their brains are bankrupt.”
37. “Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife.”
38. “No humorist is under any obligation to provide answers and probably if you were to delve into the literary history of humour it’s probably all about not providing answers because the humorist essentially says: this is the way things are.”
39. “Not much was really invented during the Renaissance, if you don’t count modern civilization.”
40. “One of the annoying things about believing in free will and individual responsibility is the difficulty of finding somebody to blame your problems on. And when you do find somebody, it’s remarkable how often his picture turns up on your driver’s license.”

Awesome Quotes Images From P. J. O’Rourke
41. “Only a few good leaders have paused to reflect seriously on being leaders.”
42. “Personally, I believe a rocking hammock, a good cigar, and a tall gin-and-tonic is the way to save the planet.”
43. “Pollution is a problem, and there’s the whole problem of the spoiling of the commons, but we’ve addressed the pollution problem on a variety of different levels in a variety of ways, and it’s worked pretty well.”
44. “Popular culture has become engorged, broadening and thickening until it’s the only culture anyone notices.”
45. “Predicting innovation is something of a self-canceling exercise: the most probable innovations are probably the least innovative.”
46. “Republicans are the party that says government doesn’t work, and then they get elected and prove it.”
47. “Self-interest leads to honing your skills, the better to trade with.”
48. “Seriousness is stupidity sent to college.”
49. “Smoking is very bad for you and should only be done because it looks so good. People who don’t smoke have a terrible time finding something polite to do with their lips.”
50. “Soldiers are not policemen, and it’s very unfair, even for those soldiers who have some police training, to burden them with police duties. It’s not what they’re trained for, or equipped for.”

Philosophical Sayings Pictures By P. J. O’Rourke
51. “The American political system is like fast food, mushy, insipid, made out of disgusting parts of things… and everybody wants some.”
52. “The Australian language is easier to learn than boat talk. It has a vocabulary of about six words.”
53. “The C student starts a restaurant. The A student writes restaurant reviews.”
54. “The Democrats are the party of government activism, the party that says government can make you richer, smarter, taller, and get the chickweed out of your lawn. Republicans are the party that says government doesn’t work, and then get elected and prove it.”
55. “The Tea Party has definitely increased political involvement, not only among Tea Party members but among people who oppose the Tea Party members. It’s been a general stimulus.”
56. “The budget doesn’t have much control over the government. Then again, the government doesn’t have much control over the budget.”
57. “The most futuristic aspect of the House of the Future was that it was made almost entirely of plastic.”
58. “The sport of skiing consists of wearing three thousand dollars’ worth of clothes and equipment and driving two hundred miles in the snow in order to stand around at a bar and get drunk.”
59. “The very existence of the bicycle is an offense to reason and wisdom.”
60. “The weirder you’re going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too. When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing extraordinary about that person.”

Creative Quotes Images From P. J. O’Rourke
61. “The young are adept at learning, but even more adept at avoiding it.”
62. “Then proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to.”
63. “There are a lot of mysterious things about boats, such as why anyone would get on one voluntarily.”
64. “There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well, please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences.”
65. “There’s one more terrifying fact about old people; I’m going to be one soon.”
66. “These days, the honeymoon is rehearsed much more often than the wedding.”
67. “Vegetables are something God invented to let women get even with their children.”
68. “When you think of the good old days, think one word: dentistry.”
69. “You can always reason with a barnyard animal too for all the good it does.”
70. “You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they’re going.”

71. “Zen martini: A martini with no vermouth at all. And no gin, either”


