TOP 50 Short Sayings On Funny Parenting | Free Hd Background Pictures Download
Many famous people have shared their valuable thoughts about Funny Parenting which you will find here together. You may have heard these renowned quotes about Funny Parenting before. The people, whom these quotes came from also felt end experienced life like us and that’s why you will find similarities with your inner thoughts with them. After reading you will understand that their thoughts are quite as same as ours because they are also human and just like us. They belong to the same perspective of observing life as we do. So, what are you thinking? Discover the views of a person who feels the same way we do. You are scrolling through the most positive quotes and images about Funny Parenting that are wise and true to life. For you, we have created this collection that consists of Funny Parenting sayings coming from different sources of the internet.
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Table of Contents
Famous Quotes Images On Funny Parenting
1. “A baby changes your dinner party conversation from politics to poops.” – Maurice Johnston
2. “Adolescence is perhaps nature’s way of preparing parents to welcome the empty nest.” – Karen Savage and Patricia Adams
3. “We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.” – Phyllis Diller
4. “My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first one being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.” – Erma Bombeck
5. “Children are a great comfort in your old age- and they help you reach it faster too.” – Lionel Kauffman
6. “Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.” – David Frost
7. “When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he’s doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.” – Erma Bombeck
8. “Kids are like buckets of disease that live in your house.” – Louis C. K.
9. “I used to believe my father about everything but then I had children myself & now I see how much stuff you make up just to keep yourself from going crazy.” – Brian Andreas
10. “Parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I’m not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.” – Bill Cosby


Favorite Sayings Pictures About Funny Parenting
11. “Never have more children than you have car windows.” – Erma Bombeck
12. “Do your kids a favor-don’t have any.” – Robert Orben
13. “It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, snowblower, or vacuum cleaner.” – Ben Bergor
14. “To be a successful father there is one absolute rule: when you have a kid don’t look at it for the first two years.” – Ernest Hemingway
15. “24/7 – Once you sign on to be a mother, that’s the only shift they offer.” – Jodi Picoult
16. “All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.” – Erma Bombeck
17. “What is a home without children. Quiet.” – Henny Youngman
18. “If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, keep away from children.” – Susan Savannah
19. “Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; Now I have six children and no theories.” – John Wilmot
20. “The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.” – Clarence Day


Best Quotes Images About Funny Parenting
21. “Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.” – P.J. O’Rourke
22. “Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.” – Phyllis Diller
23. “The biggest thing I remember is that there was just no transition. You hit the ground diapering.” – Paul Reiser
24. “A child is a curly dimpled lunatic.” – Ralph Emerson
25. “Men should always change diapers. It’s mentally cleansing. It’s like washing dishes, but imagine if the dishes were your kids, so you really love the dishes.” – Chris Martin
26. “Parents are the bones on which children cut their teeth.” – Peter Ustinov
27. “Few things are more satisfying than seeing your own children have teenagers of their own.” – Doug Larson
28. “Raising kids is part joy and part guerilla warfare.” – Ed Asner
29. “Having children is like living in a frat house, nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.” – Ray Romano
30. “Children aren’t happy without something to ignore, and that’s what parents were created for.” – Ogden Nash


Motivating Quotes Pictures About Funny Parenting
31. “I don’t think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.” – Woody Allen
32. “Now, as always, the most automated appliance in a household is the mother.” – Beverly Jones
33. “You can learn many things from chidren. How much patience you have for instance.” – Franklin P. Jones
34. “A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm.” – Bill Vaughan
35. “Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap on a rope.” – Bill Cosby
36. “In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn’t danced on television.” – Erma Bombeck
37. “A truly appreciative child will break, lose, spoil, or fondle to death any really successful gift within a matter of minutes.” – Russell Lynes
38. “Parenthood is a lot easier to get into then out of.” – Bruce Lanskiy
39. “Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath, and hope we’ve set aside enough money to pay for our kids’ therapy.” – Michelle Pfeiffer
40. “I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.” – Dave Barry


Meaningful Sayings Pictures About Funny Parenting
41. “Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.” – Joyce Armor
42. “Insanity is hereditary you get it from your kids.” – Sam Levenson
43. “Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.” – Phyllis Diller
44. “The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.” – Calvin Trillin
45. “I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I’ve done my job.” – Roseanne Barr
46. “The problem with children is that you have to put up with their parents.” – Charles De Lint
47. “I am not allowed to sing, dance, laugh or wear short skirts. Having a teenage daughter is like living with the Taliban.” – Kathy Lette
48. “The truth is that parents aren’t really interested in justice. They just want quiet.” – Bill Cosby
49. “Usually the triumph of my day is, you know, everybody making it to the potty.” – Julia Roberts
50. “When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.” – Erma Bombeck

