48+ Favorite Sayings On Funny Divorce | Free Hd Wallpaper Pictures Download
Many famous people have shared their valuable thoughts about Funny Divorce which you will find here together. You may be familiar with these famous sayings about Funny Divorce. The people, whom these quotes came from also felt end experienced life like us and that’s why you will find similarities with your inner thoughts with them. Probably the reason behind the similarity with our thoughts with their deep words, they also went through and observed the same situations as us. They have seen life from the same perspective as we have. Don’t think over and over anymore. Be comfortable and learn from their thoughts, how a famous person can share the same feeling as us. Dive into the truest and wisest collection of quotes and images about Funny Divorce that is full of positivity. From all over the internet, we have collected all these famous Funny Divorce quotes only for you.
See which one you prefer most from more than 48 quotes about Funny Divorce with images and get going. Adding these Funny Divorce quotes for pictures to your message will surely add some weight, you’ll know. They represent the inner thoughts that we feel in the different phases of our life. We collected these beautiful images with quotes about Funny Divorce for you because we understand the value of your thoughts and feeling. Choose whatever quote you want to. We proudly bring to you this remarkable collection of pictures with quotes about Funny Divorce. You are also permitted to share these images of Funny Divorce quotes on any kind of social media platforms like Fb, Messenger, WhatsApp, Twitter, or Instagram. Share the picture of that Funny Divorce quote that represents your inner thought. For you only, all the Funny Divorce quotes images have been created that you are going to explore now.
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Beautiful Quotes Pictures On Funny Divorce
1. “Love, the quest; marriage, the conquest; divorce, the inquest.” – Helen Rowland
2. “The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money.” – Johnny Carson
3. “The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers.” – Woody Allen
4. “To get over my divorce, I got a prescription to live at the Playboy Mansion for a while.” – James Caan
5. “Whoever said Marriage is a 50-50 proposition laid the foundation for more divorce fees than any other short sentence in our language.” – Austin Elliot
6. “Today, it is easier to get divorced in most states than to get a transmission repaired properly.” – Dave Barry
7. “Marriages don’t last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?” – Rita Rudner
8. “I bequeath all my property to my wife on the condition that she remarry immediately. Then there will be at least one man to regret my death.” – Heinrich Heine
9. “There are four stages in a marriage. First there’s the affair, then the marriage, then children and finally the fourth stage, without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.” – Norman Mailer
10. “My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce. Murder, yes, but divorce, never.” – Jack Benny
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11. “You know why divorces are so expensive? Because they’re worth it.” – Willie Nelson
12. “A 99-year-old man is filing for divorce from his 96-year-old wife, making them the world’s oldest divorced couple. It’s got to be weird when a divorce lawyer is fighting for your kids to get custody of you.” – Jimmy Fallon
13. “Divorce is a declaration of independence with only two signers.” – Gerald F. Lieberman
14. “I’d marry again if I found a man who had $15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the marriage and guarantee he’d be dead in a year.” – Bette Davis
15. “A divorce is like an amputation: you survive it, but there’s less of you.” – Margaret Atwood
16. “The happiest time of anyone’s life is just after the first divorce.” – John Kenneth Galbraith
17. “Getting divorced just because you don’t love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor
18. “A divorce lawyer is a chameleon with a law book.” – Marvin Mitchelson
19. “Its easier to get a divorce than pass the driving test. Now its just a basic form-filling exercise.” – Paul Coleridge
20. “Divorce is the psychological equivalent of a triple coronary bypass.” – Mary Kay Blakely
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21. “For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermuda is over in two weeks, but a divorce is something you always have.” – Woody Allen
22. “I should have known something was wrong with my first wife. When I brought her home to meet my parents, they approved of her.” – Woody Allen
23. “You can’t stay married in a situation where you are afraid to go to sleep in case your wife might cut your throat.” – Mike Tyson
24. “Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck. If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left.” – Jean Kerr
25. “In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find and continue to find grounds for marriage.” – Robert Anderson
26. “My divorce came to me as a complete surprise. That’s what happens when you haven’t been home in eighteen years.” – Lee Trevino
27. “She cried and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.” – Tommy Manville
28. “When I divorced I went through the various stages of grieving: anger, denial, and dancing around with my settlement check.” – Maura Kennedy
29. “The only solid and lasting peace between a man and his wife is, doubtless, a separation.” – Lord Chesterfield
30. “Just another of our many disagreements. He wants a no fault divorce, whereas I would prefer to have the bastard crucified.” – J. B. Handelsman
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31. “A New York divorce is in itself a diploma of virtue.” – Edith Wharton
32. “I got divorced recently. It was a mixed marriage. I’m human, he’s Klingon.” – Carol Leifer
33. “I’m not upset about my divorce. I’m only upset I’m not a widow.” – Roseanne Barr
34. “Ah, yes, divorce from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.” – Robin Williams
35. “I look a divorce this way: it’s better to have loved and lost, then to live with that bitch for the rest of my life.” – Steve McGrew
36. “Workaholicism is such a tough addiction to get over. I had to divorce my wife because she was an enabler.” – Dave Mordal
37. “Divorce sucks. Let me tell you, after five years of marriage, it is devastating to have the person with the good credit move out.” – Rich Vos
38. “My husband and I have never considered divorce. Murder sometimes, but never divorce.” – Joyce Brothers
39. “He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor
40. “My mother always said don’t marry for money, divorce for money.” – Wendy Liebman
Famous Sayings Images About Funny Divorce
41. “Divorces are made in heaven.” – Oscar Wilde
42. “A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.” – Jean Kerr
43. “Divorce, a bugle blast that separates the combatants and makes them fight at long range.” – Ambrose Bierce
44. “In our family, we don’t divorce our men, we bury them.” – Ruth Gordon
45. “You should be prepared for anything during divorce proceedings, even the truth.” – Dave Barry
46. “In Palm Springs, they think homelessness is caused by bad divorce lawyers.” – Garry Trudeau
47. “A lot of people have asked me how short I am. Since my last divorce, I think I’m about $100,000 short.” – Mickey Rooney
48. “A bachelor is a selfish, undeserving guy who has cheated some woman out of a divorce.” – Don Quinn
49. “American husbands are the best in the world; no other husbands are so generous to their wives, or can be so easily divorced.” – Elinor Glyn
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Shuvo
Hi there! I Am Shuvo Saha. I am a Musician. I play Bass. Besides that, I love to explore. As in, surf the web, gather knowledge, and share them. Recently, I have discovered that Blogging can be quite a useful way, to share. Being a thoughtful person, and a social being, I find it very amusing to explore people's thoughts, observations, and experiences. Regardless of time, place, situation, event, or occasion, it is in our human nature, to learn and express. Many of these expressions of life, result in taking the form of wishes, quotes, greetings, messages, and captions. I, with my lovely Wishian team, gather the expressions, sort them out, organize them with suitable background images, and serve them to you. So that you can share them back, with the whole world.
