143+ Motivational Quotes By Ambrose Bierce | Free Hd Background Pictures Download
The famous Ambrose Bierce have shared many valuable thoughts about various things, which you will find here together. You may be familiar with these famous sayings by Ambrose Bierce. In many places, they are being used which came from the people who also consisted the same feelings as us. Whether it’s a matter of happiness, or sorrow, a feeling of fulfillment, or grief, a story of success, or loss. They have observed their life from the viewpoint we have. You are the best, so have no doubt and express yourself. You will see that the thoughts and feelings of famous people are not any different from ours. The truest, wisest, and most positive quotes and images from Ambrose Bierce that you can find to scroll through. We have picked out these best Ambrose Bierce sayings from the internet for you.
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Knowledgable Quotes Pictures From Ambrose Bierce
1. “A bride is a woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.”
2. “A coward is one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.”
3. “A funeral is a pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker.”
4. “A leech who, having penetrated the shell of a turtle only to find that the creature has long been dead, deems it expedient to form a new attachment to a fresh turtle.”
5. “A penny saved is a penny to squander.”
6. “A person of greater enterprise than discretion, who in embracing an opportunity has formed an unfortunate attachment.”
7. “A rabbit’s foot may bring good luck to you, but it brought none to the rabbit.”
8. “A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.”
9. “Ability is commonly found to consist mainly in a high degree of solemnity.”
10. “Absence blots people out. We really have no absent friends.”
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11. “Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.”
12. “Acquaintance is a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor and obscure, and intimate when he is rich and famous.”
13. “Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.”
14. “Adolescence: A stage between infancy and adultery.”
15. “All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.”
16. “Alligator: The crocodile of America, superior in every detail to the crocodile of the effete monarchies of the Old World.”
17. “Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.”
18. “An absolute monarchy is one in which the sovereign does as he pleases so long as he pleases the assassins.”
19. “An acquaintance is someone we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.”
20. “Appeal. In law, to put the dice into the box for another throw.”
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21. “April fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly.”
22. “Architect: One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.”
23. “At pomp and fuss-and-feathers while you jeer, Each member of your order tries to graft A peacock’s tail upon his barren rear,”
24. “BATH, n. A kind of mystic ceremony substituted for religious worship, with what spiritual efficacy has not been determined.”
25. “BRANDY, n. A cordial composed on one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the-grave and four parts clarified Satan.”
26. “Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.”
27. “Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.”
28. “CLOCK, n. A machine of great moral value to man, allaying his concern for the future by reminding him what a lot of time remains to him.”
29. “CONSOLATION, n. The knowledge that a better man is more unfortunate than yourself.”
30. “Cemetery, n. an isolated suburban spot where mourners match lies, poets write at a target and stone cutters spell for a wager.”
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31. “Circus a place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women and children acting the fool.”
32. “Congratulations is the civility of envy.”
33. “Convictions are variable; to be always consistent is to be sometimes dishonest.”
34. “Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.”
35. “Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.”
36. “Creditor. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their desolating incursions.”
37. “Curiosity, n. An objectionable quality of the female mind. The desire to know whether or not a woman is cursed with curiosity is one of the most active and insatiable passions of the masculine soul.”
38. “Cynic, n. A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are not as they ought to be.”
39. “DELEGATION, n. In American politics, an article of merchandise that comes in sets.”
40. “DIPLOMACY, n. Lying in state, or the patriotic art of lying for one’s country.”
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41. “DISCRIMINATE, v.i. To note the particulars in which one person or thing is, if possible, more objectionable than another.”
42. “Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.”
43. “Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.”
44. “Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket.”
45. “Distress: A disease incurred by exposure to the prosperity of a friend.”
46. “Divorce, a bugle blast that separates the combatants and makes them fight at long range.”
47. “Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.”
48. “Doubt begins only at the last frontiers of what is possible.”
49. “Doubt is the father of invention.”
50. “Doubt, indulged and cherished, is in danger of becoming denial; but if honest, and bent on thorough investigation, it may soon lead to full establishment of the truth.”
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51. “Duty, that which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire.”
52. “ENTERTAINMENT, n. Any kind of amusement whose inroads stop short of death by injection.”
53. “Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else”
54. “Enthusiasm, a distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward applications of experience.”
55. “Epitaph, n. An inscription on a tomb, showing that virtues acquired by death have a retroactive effect.”
56. “Erudition – dust shaken out of a book into an empty skull.”
57. “Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.”
58. “FIDELITY, n. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.”
59. “FOREFINGER, n. The finger commonly used in pointing out two malefactors.”
60. “Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.”
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61. “Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.”
62. “Fidelity, a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.”
63. “Friendless. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense.”
64. “GNOSTICS, n. A sect of philosophers who tried to engineer a fusion between the early Christians and the Platonists. The former would not go into the caucus and the combination failed, greatly to the chagrin of the fusion managers.”
65. “Genealogy: An account of one’s descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his own.”
66. “Grammar, n. A system of pitfalls thoughtfully prepared for the feet of the self-made man, along the path by which he advances to distinction.”
67. “HURRICANE, n. An atmospheric demonstration once very common but now generally abandoned for the tornado and cyclone. The hurricane is still in popular use in the West Indies and is preferred by certain old-fashioned sea-captains.”
68. “Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising for contemplating the misery of another.”
69. “Heathen, n. A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something that he can see and feel.”
70. “Human nature is pretty well balanced; for every lacking virtue there is a rough substitute that will serve at a pinch, as cunning is the wisdom of the unwise, and ferocity the courage of the coward.”
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71. “Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo.”
72. “If life were not worth having,’ said the preacher, ‘T would have in suicide one pleasant feature.’ ‘An error,’ said the pessimist, ‘you’re making: What’s not worth having cannot be worth taking.”
73. “Immigrant: An unenlightened person who thinks one country better than another.”
74. “In each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.”
75. “Intolerance is natural and logical, for in every dissenting opinion lies an assumption of superior wisdom.”
76. “It is evident that skepticism, while it makes no actual change in man, always makes him feel better.”
77. “Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.”
78. “Lawyers are: One skilled in the circumvention of the law.”
79. “Longevity uncommon extension of the fear of death.”
80. “Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.”
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81. “Love is a temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder.”
82. “Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.”
83. “MONUMENT, n. A structure intended to commemorate something which either needs no commemoration or cannot be commemorated.”
84. “Marriage: A master, a mistress and two slaves, making in all, two.”
85. “Meekness: uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.”
86. “Monday, n. In Christian countries, the day after the baseball game.”
87. “Monkey, an arboreal animal which makes itself at home in genealogical trees.”
88. “NOISE, n. A stench in the ear. Undomesticated music. The chief product and authenticating sign of civilization.”
89. “No more the swindler singly seeks his prey; To hunt in couples is the modern way A rascal, from the public to purloin, An honest man to hide away the coin.”
90. “ORPHAN, n. A living person whom death has deprived of the power of filial ingratitude , a privation appealing with a particular eloquence to all that is sympathetic in human nature. When young the orphan is commonly sent to an asylum, where by careful cultivation of its rudimentary sense of locality it is taught to know its place. It is then instructed in the arts of dependence and servitude and eventually turned loose to prey upon the world as a bootblack or scullery maid.”
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91. “Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man, who has no gills.”
92. “Opportunity is a favorable occasion for grasping a disappointment.”
93. “Optimism: The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.”
94. “PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one’s credibility for future delivery.”
95. “Painting, the art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.”
96. “Perseverance, a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.”
97. “Philanthropist, A rich and usually bald old gentleman who has trained himself to grin while his conscience is picking his pocket.”
98. “Philosophy, a route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.”
99. “Phoenix, n. The classical prototype of the modern ‘small hot bird.'”
100. “Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.”
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101. “Polite, adj. Skilled in the art and practice of dissimulation.”
102. “Politeness , The most acceptable hypocrisy.”
103. “Politics, noun. A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.”
104. “Prejudice, a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.”
105. “RECREATION, n. A particular kind of dejection to relieve a general fatigue.”
106. “ROPE, n. An obsolescent appliance for reminding assassins that they too are mortal. It is put about the neck and remains in place one’s whole life long.”
107. “Religion is the daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.”
108. “Responsibility: A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.”
109. “Rum, n. Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.”
110. “SAFETY-CLUTCH, n. A mechanical device acting automatically to prevent the fall of an elevator, or cage, in case of an accident to the hoisting apparatus.”
Philosophical Quotes Pictures By Ambrose Bierce
111. “SELFISH, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.”
112. “Sabbath, a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and was arrested on the seventh.”
113. “San Francisco is the place where most people were last seen.”
114. “Scriptures – The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.”
115. “Self-denial is indulgence of a propensity to forego.”
116. “Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.”
117. “Still must our ears without redress submit To hear you play the solemn hypocrite Walking in spirit some high moral level, Raising at once his eye-balls and the devil?”
118. “Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellow.”
119. “TAIL, n. The part of an animal’s spine that has transcended its natural limitations to set up an independent existence in a world of its own.”
120. “Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.”
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121. “That gold refines not, sweetens not a life of conjugal brutality and strife, that vice is vulgar though it gilded shine.”
122. “The best kind of onion soup is the simplest kind.”
123. “The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forbearance among men.”
124. “The fallen soldier (the word “hero” appears to be a later invention) has such humble honors as it is possible to give. His part in all the pomp that fills The circuit of the Summer hills Is that his grave is green. True, more than a half of the green graves in the Grafton cemetery are marked unknown, and sometimes it occurs that one thinks of the contradiction involved in honoring the memory of whom no memory remains to honor, but the attempt seems to do no great harm to the living, even to the logical.”
125. “The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.”
126. “The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.”
127. “The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.”
128. “The poor man’s price of admittance to the favor of the rich is his self-respect.”
129. “The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.”
130. “The slightest acquaintance with history shows that powerful republics are the most warlike and unscrupulous of nations.”
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131. “The summer squash promoted. Harvested the sweet potato.”
132. “Theology is a thing of unreason altogether, an edifice of assumptions and dreams, a superstructure without a substructure.”
133. “There would be far fewer accidents if we could only teach telephone poles to be more careful.”
134. “They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.”
135. “To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.”
136. “To be comic is merely to be playful, but wit is a serious matter. To laugh at it is to confess that you do not understand.”
137. “Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, advocates and jurors.”
138. “Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.”
139. “When you doubt, abstain.”
140. “Wisdom is known only by contrasting it with folly; by shadow only we perceive that all visible objects are not flat. Yet Philanthropos would abolish evil!”
141. “Wit, the salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out.”
142. “With brains and honesty, some five and twenty long years as champion of all that’s good.”
143. “ZEUS n. The chief of Grecian gods, adored by the Romans as Jupiter and by the modern Americans as God, Gold, Mob and Dog.”
144. ““Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage.””
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